Cover Snark: Sound the Alarms for a Full Back Tattoo

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Welcome back to Cover Snark!

One for the Road by Elliot Fletcher. An illustrated cover. A rocky beach at sunset. A man with light brown hair and a beard stands behind a woman. He has glasses and is wearing a white button down shirt. A blonde woman in a red gingham dress is in front of him with her arm up, wrapping around his face. Her head is tilted to the side, giving us concerns about her neck.

From Kelly: Where did his fingers go? Also their eyebrows are distractingly the exact same color as their hair.

Sarah: I maintain that faces and necks are hard to draw.

Elyse: She looks like when my sister would pull off my Barbie’s head and I’d stick it back on but the neck would disappear.

Sarah: It’s never the same, is it? Like when you wash a Barbie’s hair. It never looks right afterward.

Home Ice by Saxon James. A shirtless dude standing in profile. He has very poofy hair and is biting his thumb. Dandelion fluff is swirling around him.

From HeatherS: My first reaction to the poor model’s hairstyle was “What in the Foghorn Leghorn?” Because they made him look like a rooster. Handsome fella doesn’t deserve bad hair.

Sarah: What in the Flock of Seagulls?

Also the dandelion head and the seeds flying are very distracting.

Amanda: Honestly, I’m impressed by the volume.

Simon by V.A. Dold. A blond man is facing away from us in a pair of light wash, low rise jeans. His hands are on his head. The background is of an estate surrounded by trees, but everything has a royal blue filter. The man has a giant wolf head tattooed on his back and the wolf has light blue eyes.

From Karoline: I swear to all that is holy, when I scrolled by I thought the author’s first name was Vag. And that doesn’t even address….the wolf.

Sarah: Yes to both.

I keep thinking of Jennifer Garner talking about Ben Affleck’s mammoth phoenix tattoo on his back: “Bless his heart.”

Also sent by Heather.

Susan: My brain keeps reading the gold with the hole in it as an arsehole, even though I know it’s in the wrong place.

Amanda: I think about Ben’s back tattoo like once a month.

Sarah: Omg same.

The Thinning by Inga Simpson. The night sky with stars, but there's some sort of design, as if we're looking up at it through a hole and the hole looks very much like the shape of a vagina.

Elyse: I just added this to my TBR to see if that cover intentionally resembles a vagina or not.

Carrie: I thought it was a uterus with the lining thinning as it does during menopause (am hot flashing as I type).

Sarah: Isn’t “Vagina in the Sky” a song by, like, Kansas?

Elyse: I just laughed hard enough that it scared the cat.

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